Grey's Journal

July 30th to August 9th

A promising PhD candidate was presenting his thesis at his final examination.  He proceeded with a derivation and ended up with:

        F = -MA

He was embarrassed, his supervising professor was embarrassed, and the rest of the committee was embarrassed.  The student coughed nervously and said "I seem to have made a slight error back there somewhere."

One of the mathematicians on the committee replied dryly, "Either that or an odd number of them"

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A day without fusion is like a day without sunshine.

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I once knew a man so negative, when he was added to a party people asked "Who left?"

* * *

A student recognizes Einstein in a train and asks:
Excuse me, professor, but does New York stop by this train?

* * *

There was this physicist who was in the habit of getting home quite late. One time, he came home at 2:30 a.m. with a torn shirt, lipstick on his collar, hair messed up, and generally looking like hell. His wife caught him coming in the door and demanded to know why he came home so late.

His story:

"Well, after I quit work for the day, a few friends and I went out to the bar for a few drinks. We met up with some rather good-looking young women, and started to drink to excess; things just kept happening, as you can well see. I sobered up enough to note how late it was, so I rushed home."

She said, "YOU LIAR! YOU WERE IN THE LAB AGAIN, WEREN'T YOU?!"